For Rose, emotional intelligence is recognizing and understanding your own emotions and those of others around you. It‘s important, because at the end of the day, we’re all human. Managing the emotional landscape is a powerful way of learning how to build strong relationships. Here are her insights on how to bring your best self to every interaction:
1) You can’t control other people’s behaviors, you can only control the way you react to them.
This is something I remind myself of consistently. It is important to focus on what you can manage. Your response sets the tone for what the other person does next. For example, if you are in the middle of a heated discussion and act out of anger, the other person may get more agitated. If, on the other hand, you respond calmly, you can de-escalate the situation and create the opportunity for a dialogue.
2) People are human and will have good and bad days.
Even professional athletes who are at their peak performance have a bad game or two. We typically have a higher tolerance level with those we know well because we have an understanding of their track record of strong performance. That’s understandable, however, it’s important to realize that this is also true for those we don’t know as well. Everyone has things going on in their life that you may not be aware of. It’s important to show them empathy and patience.
3) Put yourself in the other person’s shoes.
Before you react to what someone else has said, ask yourself these questions: “What must the other person be feeling/have gone through in order to do or say what they just did?”, “How would I respond in the same situation, and what would I want another person to do?” By viewing the situation as if it were you, you can put it in context and react in a more compassionate way.
4) Own up!
If you mess up, admit it. Whether that is dropping the ball on an assignment, showing a display of emotion that may be unflattering, etc., showing your humanity and humility helps to build trust. Owning your mistakes demonstrates a valuable lesson: that it’s OK to fail and learn how to better yourself from the experience.
When I was 15, I interned at a company and met my mentor of 31 years. He believed that I had the potential to run a major division of a corporation. He planted the seed that has helped me grow into who I’ve become today.
Describe your family—
Diversity at its best! When we get together, it’s like the United Nations. Puerto Rican, Peruvian, Guyanese, Portuguese, African-American, Italian, Caucasian, French, German … the list goes on. In my immediate family, I have three sons (TJ, 30, Jayden, 10 and Bryce, 6) and two grandsons (Maison, 2, Tanner, 1).
What’s the best piece of advice you‘ve ever received?
The two that stick out are: 1) Be kind and help others and 2) Perfect is the enemy of good.
What’s your favorite movie/book?
I love the movie “A Few Good Men.“ I read “The Da Vinci Code“ over a weekend so I guess that would be one of my favorites. I’m also reading a book now with my 10-year-old son called “Wonder.“ It’s a touching story with many lessons for kids and adults.
What are your hobbies?
I love sports. Football, baseball, basketball, you name it. I also like throwing memorable parties; making those around me feel special is so enjoyable.
What are you most passionate about?
Helping others excel in areas where they had no idea they could. Whether it‘s cheering at one of my boys‘ football games or helping them do well on a test, I love it! Also, being in the world of Human Resources gives me the opportunity to help others flourish.