Hit the Restart Button

My teenage daughter Danielle is a dancer and she was participating at a dance show at the Museum of Science and Industry in downtown Chicago this past weekend.  We were driving downtown for the show and for whatever reason I had this nagging thought that perhaps I got my times mixed up.  I asked for my daughter to check my Smartphone calendar and much to my dismay she confirmed that we had left 30 minutes late.  First lesson - This is what I get for relying on my memory instead of what I put on my calendar.

When we arrived to the Museum and raced to the stage; we arrived just in time to watch her dance company get on stage.  She was so distressed she ran back stage in tears and couldn’t even bear to watch the dance she was suppose to be in.  I can’t even begin to put into words how horrible I felt because this is a passion of hers.  I followed her to the back and just held her as she cried.  The only thing I could tell her is that I’m only human and I feel awful getting the times incorrect.  As her dance company came off stage they came over and gave her a hug and the dance studio staff consoled her as well.  It did make her feel well that she was sincerely missed; although the tears kept flowing and she kept telling me it was alright.

In past years, after dancing at the Museum we usually stay to look at the display of beautiful Christmas trees they have displayed representing countries around the world.  Danielle didn’t have the desire to see the trees, she just wanted to leave the Museum.  As we were walking out to our car, I suggested that perhaps we have lunch at a favorite place downtown; but she told me she just wanted to go home and lay on the sofa.  I made the comment gently, I don’t mind going home; but I’m not going to allow her to lay on the sofa and sulk for the rest of the day.  It was that comment that resonated with her.

She immediately brightened up and said … Mom you’re right; let’s go to our favorite restaurant and enjoy the rest of our day.  What struck me the most is that I could immediately feel the shift in her behavior as she hit the restart button on her day.   I often discuss with my daughter that it is our choice on how we react to an event or person AND for how long we hold onto that emotion.  We’ve discussed the restart button numerous times; but this was the first time I’ve seen her fully let go of a situation and fully embrace the balance of her day with exuberance.