Making Your Time A Priority
I was talking to a friend of mind over the weekend who is always so busy running around do this and that. She always seem to have time to for everybody and everything but herself.
Why do women tend to always place themselves last on their list of priorities?
Dr. Madeline
President/CEO
Deline Institute for Professional Development
Website: www.delineinstitute.net
Email: women [at] delineinstitute [dot] net women [at] delineinstitute [dot] net
Hi LaurenC;
You are probably right, the old nurture versus nature. However, the biggest problem I see with women trying to do it all....is they have not learned how to say one simple word. And the word is "No." If women would learn how to say "no" then some of their burdens would be released. Try it....
- No I can't do it for you today
- No I have something else do to
- No I am on my way to get a manicure
- No I cannot pick up your laundry
- No I cannot take you to the store
- No I cannot watch your dog
Try some of these responses and see how much better you will feel and how much more you get accomplished....for yourself.
Dr. Madeline
I love your advice about learning to say no. I know that growing up I was taught to always be polite and to try to be as pleasant as possible. This overarching desire to please everyone can really squash a person’s ability to voice what they actually want or need. I think we see this more in women and girls then in men. Lots of women are taught from a young age to be helpers, caretakers, and to overall put others first. This is not a bad thing, but it can be abused very easily. I find myself agreeing to things I do not have time for/ do not have any desire to do, simply because someone asked me. I think we all, women and girls especially, need to consider our own needs and make sure to please ourselves.
I've heard many people say it's a motherly instinct. (At least that's what my male neighbors whom I work with and occasionally cook for call it.)
And I guess part of that is true. We always see women balancing the modern ideal of women doing anything but many still hold on the feeling of wanting to take care of others. And when we throw them together you wind up with a full plate and no time for yourself.