Since the birth of her son, Angelo, in 2012, Adele has been refreshingly open to speaking about her experiences with motherhood, especially her struggles with postpartum depression.
In her 2017 Grammy’s acceptance speech for Album of the Year, she initially touched on how postpartum affected her. “In my pregnancy and through becoming a mother, I lost a lot of myself, and I’ve struggled. I still do struggle being a mom — it’s really hard. But tonight, winning this kinda feels full circle and like a bit of me has come back to myself.”
Now, five years later, Adele has discussed how she rallied in an interview with The Face Magazine. “There are definitely a few elements of myself that I don’t think I’ll ever get back. More than anything, it’s the freedom of being able to do whatever you want, whenever you want. Going somewhere and not having to prioritize someone else. Whereas my number one priority with everything I do since I had Angelo, which is in life, in work, is obviously my son.”
The CDC states that one in eight women in the United States will face postpartum depression, after giving birth. Despite the condition being quite common, there is still a stigma surrounding the issue, that causes many women to keep their feelings to themselves. Adele understands this, impartially.
“My knowledge of postpartum – or post-natal, as we call it in England – is that you don’t want to be with your child. You’re worried you might hurt your child; you’re worried you weren’t doing a good job. I had really bad postpartum depression after I had my son, and it frightened me. I didn’t talk to anyone about it. I was very reluctant.”
Though it may sound shocking, it is normal for mothers experiencing postpartum to have feelings that they may accidentally or intentionally harm their baby. This makes it more difficult for those dealing with this issue to seek the help they need.
The CDC lists the following symptoms for postpartum depression:
- Crying more often than usual.
- Feelings of anger.
- Withdrawing from loved ones.
- Feeling numb or disconnected from your baby.
- Worrying that you will hurt the baby.
- Feeling guilty about not being a good mom or doubting your ability to care for the baby.
“Having no time to even brush my teeth, let alone write a record or hang out with my friends,” Adele said. “My friends, my hobbies, the things I like doing without a baby, are things that make me who I am. And I didn’t really have access to that for a while.” She accounts this feeling to a type of mourning. “It still makes me mourn myself a bit every now and then. I’m not mourning anymore, maybe I’m more yearning. A little bit like: ooh, what would I do and where would I go?”
Adele reached out to friends during this difficult time. “One day I said to a friend, ‘I f**kin’ hate this,’ and she just burst into tears and said, ‘I f**kin’ hate this, too.’ And it was done. It lifted.”
Now, Angelo is ten and Adele is all praise for her “brilliant” son. If you are experiencing similar symptoms, reach out to your GP or therapist.