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      Do you know the phrase “Cowgirl Up”? It’s like “Put on your big girl panties and deal with it” or “Suck it up and move on!” It means to step up your game, take the bull by the horns, tackle something head-on, and stop whining about it. It’s about taking initiative and making your own way, rather than waiting or expecting someone else to do it for you.

      If you’re among the more than half of employees (December 2011 survey) who are dissatisfied with the lack of career growth opportunities and you find no fit with internal job postings, what can you do but leave to find greener grass, right? Well, no, actually…there are many things you can do right where you are. In short, you can actively take responsibility for your own career growth and direction without the extreme of leaving your current job. Both you and the organization will be better for it. If you think you’re entitled to someone else saddling up your career ride, you’re wrong…so cowgirl up!

        Measure yourself on each of these action items (I’ll be providing others throughout February's blog posts) and if you can’t answer a loud and resounding “Yes!” to each, then you have plenty of career work to do right where you are.

        Yes         No       1. I know my values, motivators, skills and best work environments.

• If you do know these things, do you consciously use them in your work? If you don’t, how can you better bring them to bear? When we align with who we are (authentically), then both our satisfaction and contribution are greater.
• If you don’t know these things, then wherever you work likely won’t work well. Your career direction will always be in someone else’s hands because you don’t have the reins if you don’t know the territory. It’s your values and motivators and other unique characteristics that give you clarity on direction; once you’re conscious of them, you can define outcomes that satisfy your career and professional goals.

        Yes         No        2.  I recognize my talents and know how to leverage them at work.

• Talents are our innate capabilities that make us really, really good at certain things. Using them allows us to shine, and our work provides huge value to both us and our employer. With our talents in play, the work we do is more satisfying, we have a strong commitment to the best possible results and we enjoy what we do…it’s like play. For employers, strengths-based work means highly connected workers who go the extra distance to ensure success.
• If you haven’t taken the Strengthsfinder assessment  or the VIA Character Strengths assessment, do it! You’ll get a specific set of those behaviors and characteristics that make you your best. With strengths in mind, you can identify when and where you use them most often as well as the business areas where you could provide value. 
• Recognizing and leveraging your talents gives you clues to the kinds of work and projects that will be satisfying and challenging. Most organizations have multiple enterprises and looking into win-win opportunities before making a leap to another company is a smart career move. 

       So…cowgirl up! Don’t just turn and run thinking anywhere else is bound to be better. Begin with yourself. Do the work. You’ll find that your frustrations diminish, your confidence increases and career satisfaction is yours for the discovery. 

And stop back…we’ll discuss additional action items in future blogs. In the meantime, why not leave a comment? Would love to hear from you!

I am so excited, my new book In Her Power: Reclaiming Your Authentic Self will be in bookstores next Tuesday. It took me two years to write and I received a lot of support along with the way from some dynamic women.  It is about the nine facets of a woman’s power and the most common self-sabotaging behaviors — what I call veils — that hold us back from each.

Some of the facets of power are: recognizing your unique destiny; accepting the discomfort of change, acting with confidence, expressing yourself genuinely, cultivating intimacy, and building a Power Web. I had to confront some things about myself that I would rather have left unsaid. I found myself revealing more than I usually do in business circles because I realized that in writing down my own story I could really help others.

The book is filled with exercises and reflections to take you deeper and look at what blocks you from fully accessing your power. It is my hope that women, after reading this book, will step into their power my fully.  There is no time to waste — the world is in a crazy place, and more women leaders are needed.

Today is National Wear Red Day, so wear red in support of women’s heart health. Heart disease is the leading cause of death for women in America. Which is why organizations like WomenHeart: The National Coalition for Women with Heart Disease are so important.

WomenHeart has partnered with the Million Hearts Initiative, the first national public health initiative aimed at preventing one million heart attacks and strokes over the next five years.

Led by the Centers for Disease Control and Prevents and Centers for Medicare and Medicaid Serivces, Million Hearts aims to improve prevention of heart disease and stroke by focusing on the “ABCS”: Aspirin therapy, Blood pressure control, Cholesterol control and Smoking cessation.

“If we successfully focus on and improve the statistics in these four areas, women will benefit, because women have particular needs in these areas,” affirms Lisa Tate, CEO of WomenHeart (left). “That’s why we’re behind the Million Hearts Initiative.”

Right now, there’s more women can do. The statistics are a bit shocking. According to a report by the CDC, less than half of people at risk of cardiovascular disease are taking aspirin, less than half of people with hypertention have adequately controlled blood pressure, less than half of people with high cholesterol have adequately controlled hyperlipidemia (fats in the blood), and only 23 percent of people who want to quit smoking get some kind of help.

“The goal of this campaign is to actually change those numbers,” Lisa asserts.

So WomenHeart will be spreading the word through its website, network of over 35,000 members, and volunteers. “One of the unique things WomenHeart does is train patients, volunteers we call WomenHeart Champions, to go out and speak to other women,” says Lisa. These Champions will deliver the Million Hearts message.

“Women should urge their friends and family members to make an appointment with a doctor, find out if they’re at risk,” Lisa urges. “There are so many things you can do to prevent heart disease if you know you’re at risk… Make sure you’re getting the right blood work done. Too often people wait to get those things checked out until they’re middle aged or older and they may have been at risk for a long time.”

By Sarah Tobol, Editor

Check out our Lifesyle feature this month: Be Smart About Heart Health!

Flowers are always a beautiful gift to give a special someone for Valentine's Day. Meet floral designer Rachel Cho, who from her studio in Manhattan and store in the Bronx puts together some beautiful displays. Watch how she mixes colors and textures — even lines a vase with leaves — so you can get inspiration to maybe do it yourself this year.

Video Editor: Victoria Ng

Hello, Everyone: Janine Moon here, your February Career Coach...I'm delighted to be a resource for you on workplace and career-related issues over the next few weeks.

Success in today's workplaces requires different capabilities: rather than searching for the "right answers," successful women step into their authenticity: they know who they are; they live their values and embrace their talents; and they continually align their professional value with their organization's strategies. They develop the confidence to step gracefully into the changes that so define business environments.

So, what about me?  My authenticity stems from my long-ago reign as Ohio’s Pork Queen (!), my time as a teacher, women’s rights advocate, wife, mother, executive, marathoner/half-marathoner and career changer…called ‘job hopper’ back then! I have learned the “hard truth about the soft stuff"…that as human beings, we don’t leave our emotions at the door; and organizations and individuals are most productive when we have a deep commitment to the work we do. When organizations recognize "what got us here won’t get us there," I coach them in how to keep their talent—by getting good with the "soft stuff" of coaching, mentoring and workforce engagement.

I’m a refugee of corporate America, having spent years moving through the ranks and getting to the C-suite. I learned relationship building and enterprise growth and created, managed and implemented change. I am always delighted to challenge “we’ve always done it this way” thinking so people can sync outdated beliefs with the reality of today’s global marketplaces. My clients include manufacturing, finance and insurance sectors, associations, professional services firms and government agencies.

As one of only 5 Master Certified Career Coaches in the U.S., I help people take responsibility for lifelong and satisfying career direction. When my clients surface and nurture their identity—their authenticity—they discover their foundation and build on it. The approach—Career Ownership coaching—is the work of my book, Career Ownership: How to Create ‘Job Security’ in Any Economy. 

I completed my Master’s work at The Ohio State University, serve as an adjunct faculty member at Franklin University, and continue active involvement in the National Speakers Association and the International Coach Federation. I live in Columbus, Ohio with my beautiful rescue black lab, Shelby; while my daughter, Lara, lives a short distance away with my grand-puppy, Bailey!

I would love to hear your questions and workplace issues to include them in my blogs this month. Until I hear from you, I’ll blog on how to measure your career assets, owning v. renting your career, and likely some things on the voice inside our head—that voice that often puts us directly in our own way! 

Janine Moon

PS: Who among you gets to celebrate your birthday this month on its real date, February 29? Please leave your name in the comments area so we can all wish you a Happy Birthday on your day!

We visited Kee's Chocolates, a chocolate shop owned by Kee Ling Tong, who opened it in 2002 after leaving her job in the corporate world to pursue a dream. Take a look at our video below and watch Kee make passion fruit chocolate truffles in the shape of hearts — perfect for Valentine's Day.

Video Editor: Victoria Ng

Last night my husband and I attended a parents’ group aimed at developing some successful strategies. As a consultant and executive coach, I have always concerned myself with knowing how to build empathy skills. After all, empathy is critical for leaders at any level to develop for influencing, managing conflict, and effective interpersonal communication in general. I learned firsthand that the most challenging component of successfully expressing empathy and sympathy is validation. We learned how to verbally and nonverbally validate ourselves and others. This was really difficult for me. When I am emotionally triggered, this is the toughest skill I have ever tried to master.

What is validation? Validation communicates to another person that his or her feelings, thoughts, and actions make sense and are understandable to you in a particular situation. Remember that validation is not agreement. Validation does not necessarily mean that you like or agree with what the other person is doing, saying, or feeling. Validation means that you understand where the other person is coming from.

Why is validation helpful? It improves relationships! It makes empathy and sympathy truly work for the communication. Validation shows that we are listening, we understand, we are being nonjudgmental, we care about the relationship, and conflict is possible with decreased anxiety.

How can we validate others? 

1. Actively listen, make eye contact and stay focused with the other person while they are talking. It’s important to be mindful of both verbal and non-verbal reactions in order to avoid “invalidating” their feelings (e.g. rolling eyes, sucking teeth, walking away, saying “That’s stupid, don’t be sad,” or “I don’t care what you say”).
2. Observe what the other person is feeling in the moment. Look for a word that describes the feelings. Paraphrase what you hear or think they are feeling based on a past experience with them, i.e, “I know how much you get annoyed when someone is late.” Also, demonstrating a spontaneous expression of your validation such as saying, “I feel the same way when that happens,” or saying, “oh no!” or give a hug - which is an expression of “radical genuineness.”
3. Show tolerance, especially when you are feeling emotionally triggered. Look for how the feelings, thoughts, and action make sense, given the other person’s (or your) history and current situation, even if you don’t approve of the behaviors, emotions, action themselves.
4. Respond in a way that shows you are taking the other person seriously (with or without words). If someone is crying, give a tissue or a hug. If someone is presenting a problem, start problem solving immediately (unless the person wishes merely to be heard).

We can validate ourselves as well!  Self-validation involves perceiving your own feelings, thoughts, and action as accurate and acceptable in particular situations. This is, in fact, critical to being able to successfully validate others. We want to be authentic when we validate - and validating our own feelings will help us be present and non-judgmental as we validate other’s feelings.

Try this out yourself:

Your teammate didn’t follow through on a promise and is complaining to you about being judged harshly by the manager.

1. Now write down your first response (the one you naturally might make). 
2. Now write down a validating response. 

What did you write? My first response was “well that’s what happens when you don’t communicate you’ll be late.” My validating response: “That must have felt awful!”

Try this with some other challenging situations and build your “validation muscle.” Empathy and sympathy is much more powerful when others feel you “get” them. It lays the foundation for trust and problem solving, especially when emotions run strong.

Navigating work/life is a constant hot topic. In this clip from one of our shows, "Mothers and Sons: Raising Compassionate Men," Shelly Lazarus, Chairman of Ogilvy & Mather, and Soledad O'Brien, the anchor of CNN's morning news program "Starting Point," talk about how the love they have for their children has been the most important to them. Shelly's children are now in their 20s and 30s, while Soledad's twin sons are now seven (she also has two older daughters). But how cute are these two boys in this video? Take a look.

Speaking in front of others is something many of us have to do at some point, formally or informally, and sometimes it can be difficult. Diane Seymour is a founding member of the TAI Group. She helps clients deliver their full presence and personality for speeches and presentations. We asked her for some advice for those of us who have a hard time getting the guts to speak up.

How can you act more confidently if you’re a nervous speaker?

As you think about delivering your thoughts and perspective to the audience– take a breath. Breathing gives the audience space to better digest the message and helps them feel more confident and relaxed with you as the leader. Also, when you feel physical tension, put your attention on them (the audience). Make your connection to them much, much more important the than the physical nerves you feel. Imagine two balloons – one that inflates and grows (your focus and interest on the audience) and another one that shrinks and diminishes (your nerves). Watch one balloon get larger as the one other one disappears.

What are the key elements of commanding greater presence when you walk into a room?

Again, breathe! Imagine you have a string leading from the third button of your shirt (from the center of your sternum) gently pulling you forward as you walk up to take your place. When you arrive in front of the room, start in a “neutral” position — a relaxed stance with your feet balanced and grounded in one spot and your arms free. Starting from neutral allows the audience to focus on you and your message, rather than on any distracting body language. It also allows you to focus on making the connection with individual audience members the most important thing.

How can you create the greatest impact?

In every culture, one of the most important ways human beings influence each other is through story-telling. Stories deliver principles and emotions through metaphor and images that stick in someone’s mind. Metaphors help us see the world in new ways, and can guide us to a deeper understanding of larger organizational initiatives. Stories capture the imagination and help the audience personalize their own experience within the frame of the speaker’s content, which has a huge effect on our ability to process the speaker’s content. Stories and metaphors are ultimately about “journeys” and as an audience we appreciate being led definitively in one direction.

What is the most important principle you can share with someone who is preparing for an important presentation?

Practice makes permanent!

Visit www.thetaigroup.com for more information on Diane’s work and an upcoming program, Communicating with Power and Presence.

I am always on the lookout for simple and practical strategies for regaining internal balance during the times when I am feeling overwhelmed, afraid, and generally stressed. Our thoughts make up our experience of the world - moment to moment - and being aware of them is important. A wonderful tool we can use to expedite the process of internal growth and balance is the practice of Mindfulness. 

Mindfulness is a way to manage our attention - attending to our mind, body, heart, and spirit. It involves a self-reflection on core values and feelings, and helps us reconnect with ourselves and the world. 

Having a self-reflective practice we can use on a daily basis, especially in those moments when our stress is high, challenging emotions run strong, and our internal negative voice is gaining ground, is a powerful way to build resliency. This 4-step mindfulnelness practice helps us be present in the moment and connect with all parts of ourselves. It only takes two minutes!

1. Show up for yourself by turning inward. Sit comfortably, close your eyes and turn your attention inside your body. Breath deeply from your center or "core." Bring your attention to each part of your body and then move your attention to your heart - feel compassion for yourself and others around you.
2. Pay attention to what is going on within your mind and body by naming it. What is the emotion behind the thought?
3. Tell the truth. If the emotion is fear, embrace it. Be honest with yourself about what is behind your emotion. If it is fear, for instance, our need is for safety. Ask yourself, what threat am I committed to neutralizing? If it is anger, ask yourself what right am I committed to asserting? Your answer will provide some strategies to meet your important needs for this moment.
4. Release any attachment to the outcome. It is through release that we can get to the other side of the challenge. Know that your emotion has served an important purpose. Thank it and bid it farewell for now. When this is done with intention, it works surpirsingly well.  

The most frequent reason I let myself off the hook on these kinds of practices is lack of time, when I'm running back-to-back with meetings, projects and other commitments. But we can take a minute or two to do this. Don't we all go to the bathroom during the day? Use this time to self-reflect. This mindfulness-oriented practice can help you take your power back, courageously face barriers, and increase your resilency muscles. 

What are your favorite practices to build your resiliency?

Warmly,
Andrea Zintz, Ph.D.,
President
Strategic Leadership Resources
Shaping the Future!

February is Heart Health Month — learn more about heart disease prevention, and remember to wear red on February 3 to support the fight in the disease against women! Here's a clip from one of our shows, "Heartbeat to Heartbeat: Women and Heart Disease," featuring Lucy Lawless (remember "Xena: Warrior Princess"?) in which she discusses how important it is as women that we put our health first. Take a look.

Are you having trouble getting into the swing of things this morning? Take inspiration from the following quotes from some great thinkers. You'll be sure to get back on track.

Whatever you can do
or dream you can do
begin it.
Boldness has genius and power
and magic in it.
Begin it now!

                             — Goethe

There is a vitality, a life force, a quickening that is translated through you into action, and because there is only one of you in all time, this expression is unique. If you block it, it will never exist through any other medium and be lost. The world will not have it. It is not your business to determine how good it is; nor how valuable it is; nor how it compares with other expressions. It is your business to keep it yours, clearly and directly, to keep the channel open. ...

                             — Martha Graham

... I am of the opinion that my life belongs to the whole community and as long as I live, it is my privilege to do for it whatever I can.

I want to be thoroughly used up when I die, for the harder I work, the more I live. I rejoice in life for its own sake. Life is no "Brief candle" to me. It is a sort of spendid torch which I have got hold of for the moment and I want to make it burn as brightly as possible before handing it on to future generations.

                             — George Bernard Shaw

I've been absolutely terrified every moment of my life and I've never let it keep me from doing a single thing that I've wanted to do.

                             — Georgia O'Keefe

Until one is committed, there is hesitancy,
the chance to draw back, always ineffectiveness.
Concerning all acts of initiative (and creation)
there is one leementary truth, the ignorance of which
kills countless ideas and spendid plans:
the moment one definitely commits oneself, the providence moves too.
All sorts of things occur to help that never otherwise would have occurred.
A whole stream of events issues from the decision raising in one's favor
all manner of unforeseen incidents and meetings and material assistance
which no man could have dreamed would come his way.

                             — W.H. Murray

Engaging women and girls in science and technology is important for women already in the field. Here's a clip from one of our public television specials, “Bold Visions: Women in Science and Technology,” featuring Anne Carpenter, director of the Imaging Platform at the Broad Institute; Duy-Loan Le, the first woman and the first Asian-American to be elected TI Senior Fellow in Texas Instruments; Melina Kanakaredes, formerly of “CSI: NY.”

In the clip you’ll see them talk about the need to educate children on the importance of STEM (science, technology, engineering and math) careers. Melina tells a sweet story of her science fair project in seventh grade that was encouraged by a teacher. Take a look.

I am a big proponent of optimism. Perhaps it's because I come by it naturally and have personally found it helps to get me through most challenges. However, many studies indicate that a general orientation towards optimism has a powerful impact on performance and happiness. 

But sometimes, the most optimistic of us can fall prey to our own negative interpretations of events, which then result in painful feelings. For instance, when I heard that some of my close colleagues thought I was not supportive of them because I had been distant, I remember my feelings of anger and betrayal. Why talk about me rather than to me before making up a story? However, I realized that constructing an alternative perspective might empower them and me. I had been totally immersed in a project, and I saw that this caused them some uncertainty. I realized my relationship was valuable to them, and that they made up their own reasons for my withdrawal since they didn't understand it. This alternative interpretation gave me a foundation for a new strategy: by giving them an explanation and showing caring and appreciation for their colleagueship, I could strengthen our relationship.

So can optimism be developed if we don't naturally see the glass has half full? How do we develop a habit for optimism? We start by practicing the habit "shifting to a positive interpretation." 

Write in your journal for two minutes every day as you move through these steps:

• Step 1: Begin to challenge negative beliefs or thoughts you have about a situation, yourself, or another person.
• Step 2: Consider the alternative possibilities and list positive actions you can take to move forward and stay empowered. For example, let's say you missed your workout routine for three days and feel incredibly guilty. How can you shift to a more positive interpretation? Remind yourself that you are still healthy and just need to get back on track with actions such as: taking a few challenging classes at the gym this week to make up for it; eating healthy and cuting back calories for the next week; walking after work.

In building the “Shift to a positive interpretation” habit, it can feel like negative emotions should somehow be removed as "not OK", but this is NOT SO! Instead, simply try out looking at the situation differently. Shifting to a positive interpretation alters your emotions, leading to more rational decision-making and outcomes that are likely to be productive. This is like pressing a "pause button." In the moment when you are feeling negative emotions, pause to identify an alternative interpretation. See if you can come up with multiple positive possibilities and notice how you might take a productive action to move forward. This builds our natural optimism.

Shifting thinking when challenges arise in our lives can create win-win outcomes and generate creative solutions to move forward.

Warmly,
Andrea Zintz, Ph.D.
President
Strategic Leadership Resources
Shaping the Future!

Gossip. It’s irresistible, and often it can get us into trouble. So why does this article on CNN suggest that it might not be such a bad thing?

A series of studies in the Journal of Personality and Social Psychology concluded that gossip maintains social order. That when there’s gossip or the threat of gossip in any situation, people work together better.

In my opinion, regardless of the results of this study, gossip gets a bad rap because it should. It’s counterproductive. Via email or in person, what does talking about others accomplish? Sure, you get the satisfaction of knowing something someone else doesn’t for a short while, but then don’t you feel regret for spreading a rumor? For being malicious?

You certainly don’t want to become identified as the “office gossip.” Because then your coworkers may deem you untrustworthy. That might not only affect how your colleagues interact with you on a personal level but also on a professional level.

So what do you think about gossiping?

— Sarah Tobol, Editor

Check out Sylvia Hewlett's article on Hone Your Skills. She gives excellent advice about finding sponsors and differentiating them from mentors.

To add to her wonderful advice, I'm promoting the concept of learning to be the “perfect protégé,” a person who others are attracted to and want to mentor. Mentors provide a trusting supportive relationship for seeking advice, feedback and coaching. A "perfect protégé," for example, knows the value of listening over talking. An important aspect of making yourself attractive to sponsors and mentors alike is to be able to take negative feedback.  We can only learn if we get feedback from others. If you bristle at criticism, teachers won’t want to teach you.

Here are several ideas on mentoring that will help you attract those who can help most.

• Think mentors, not mentor. All work relationships are potential resources for addressing your developmental needs. There is probably no one single person who can help you at all stages of your career. Typical mentor-protégé relationships last two to five years. The more different types of "teachers" you have in your developmental network, the more you can draw from their different strengths. Some may turn out to be great sponsors, sounding boards, and friends.
• Not just about career. Some mentors can help you advance your career by introducing you to the right people or by acting as a buffer. But you also need people who can offer coaching and feedback that develops you from the inside out – to help enhance your sense of competence and effectiveness in a professional role.
• Consider development when evaluating job choices. Seek out positions and organizations that provide an opportunity for establishing supportive developmental relationships. Be sure to have alliances of both genders in your developmental network.
• Don’t confuse networking relationships with mentoring. In the Hone Your Skills article, Sylvia distinguishes sponsors from mentors. Add people to your network when the relationship can be mutually beneficial. When we pull people into our network, it is usually transaction-oriented (I need a job reference so I’ll call Bob.) Mentoring is a deeper commitment on both sides and isn't about doing favors for others. If you want a mentor to find you, you’ll have to signal your commitment to the relationship.

Build your network with Mentors, Sponsors and folks with whom you can ask for referrals and favors. Be sure you can attract the right mentors into your life by being the "perfect protégé!"

Warmly,
Andrea Zintz, Ph.D.
President, Strategic Leadership Resources
Shaping the Future!

Happiness is something we all strive for. Writer Gretchen Rubin made it her mission when undertaking her Happiness Project — a year of making small changes and keeping resolutions to with the goal to be happier — that generated a book and blog.

She made resolutions like, “Don’t Expect Praise or Appreciation,” “Keep a Gratitude Notebook,” and “Be Generous.” Since her book came out she has tried to keep all of her resolutions and has been largely successful.

This year, Gretchen will release a new book, Happier at Home, with new resolutions on happiness that focus around the home, time, possessions and the body.

So what are ways to increase happiness? Gretchen focuses on four questions:

• How can you increase the “feeling good” in your life? What are things that make you feel excited and enthusiastic? Bring more of these things into your life.

• How can you get rid of things that make you feel bad? What are sources of guilt, anger, resentment, boredom, anxiety? Eliminating these things is an important part of happiness.

• Do you feel that your life reflects your values? It’s hard to be happy if it doesn’t.

• Is there an atmosphere of growth in your life? Growth is important as an engine of happiness.

“There are little things you can do as part of an ordinary routine that can make you happier,” Gretchen affirms. In her home, she focuses on what she enjoys and loves and has carved out spaces for those things, calling them areas of “super engagement.”

“I really love children’s literature and I want my home to reflect this too. So I have an area for children’s literature. I cleared off bookshelves and put all my books there,” she explained. “Now when I’m in that area it feels different, more alive than it did when they were all spread out.”

In your own home, Gretchen says, “think, where do I put myself into a mode to get excited about something? How can I carve out that space?”

For a quick happiness boost, jump up and down, Gretchen says. “If you jump up and down a few times, you cheer yourself up. It’s energetic, goofy, childlike and playful.”

A drain on happiness seems to be clutter, Gretchen observes. Here are techniques to combat it:

• The one minute rule: “Anything I can do in less than a minute I have to do without delay.”

• Take 10 minutes every night before you go to bed to tidy up.

• Go “shelf by shelf.” When you have some free time, look at whatever’s in front of you — a shelf, drawer, cabinet — and organize it. Clear out what doesn’t belong.

• Be careful about what you let in. “When we own things we value them more… So if you accept that free coffee cup from the bank, once it’s in your house it’s hard to get it out.”

What Gretchen has discovered is, “It’s possible to make yourself happier within the confines of your ordinary day. You don’t need to wait for the day when you can do a two week meditation retreat or quit your job and have a totally new life.”

Find ways to create your own Happiness Project on Gretchen's blog.

By Sarah Tobol, Editor

Susan was always nervous speaking to groups. In presentations, her “performance anxiety” kicked in and her mind would go blank. Her knees would shake and she felt completely off her game. How many of us can identify with this? 

 Do you want to improve your performance in certain situation? I suggest a technique called "pre-play events." It's a habit that works effecitively and naturally to improve performance and involves visualizing what you are going to do perfectly and confidently prior to doing it. This practice vastly increases the likelihood of high performance.

A study completed by Kathleen A. Martin and Craig R. Hall demonstrated that golfers who used  visualization set higher goals, spent more time practicing, and adhered to their training programs better than those who did not visualize. Now, athletes use this technique all the time to improve their performance.

For five days prior to her presentation, for two minutes each morning, Susan wrote a description of herself delivering the presentation with confidence and poise, answering tough questions articulately, and feeling great during and after the event. When the time actually came, she performed her presentation confidently and successfully.

Pre-play events to raise your game every time!

Warmly, 

A powerful habit I encourage you to take on now is: Focusing on What’s Good.

The good news is that we have our subconscious mind, which in contrast plays possibilities, creativity, solutions and inspiration. When you’re tapping into it, it takes you from feeling distracted and overwhelmed to being focused and in control. It can be described as your natural state, which is also your zone for peak performance.

Our mindset is within our control and that we have opportunities to increase our levels of happiness by how we think and what we do on a daily basis. We can develop habits that increase the time we use this peak performance zone to tap into our best thinking and performance.

• Exercised 33% more
• Had fewer physical symptoms of stress
• Felt better about their lives
• Were more optimistic about the upcoming week
• Were more likely to have made progress toward goals

If you are already positive in your general approach, consider news headlines read or heard, or the obstacles faced daily at work or in your personal life. Each day we are hit with negative influences that challenge our positivity, resilience, and our ability to handle adversity and stay on track to our goals. By building the habit of focusing on what’s good, we are creating a built-in shield or buffer to the negative influences that inevitably arise in all our lives.

Helene advises you to take more calculated risks in the sixth installment of her smart risk-taking plan. Keep at it. Watch steps one, two, three, four and five if you’re in need of a refresher or more encouragement.

Courtesy of State Farm