Getting close to someone can be very scary. It’s also wonderful, but fears may arise like: does the person care as much for me as I care for them? Will this be a lasting relationship? As a result, when we courageously tell someone we care, we may subtly do things to push them away. Here are some ways to help us not do that.
Observe your reaction when they tell you they care
Is it unnerving when someone reveals strong feelings for you? If it is, know that you don’t have to say anything, and remain silent, even if it feels awkward. Better not to react in a way you may regret.
Check out your anger
Anger serves to push people away. When you’re about to lash out, ask yourself, “why am I really doing this? Is it the situation, or am I afraid to get close?” You’ll know the answer.
Inventory your fears
Get your fears out in the open. You don’t necessarily have to tell the other person, but you need to know what they are. It’s usually helpful to discuss your list with a trusted friend or advisor.