Being heartbroken is one of the hardest things we will go through in life. It can take months or even years to grieve a failed relationship. Getting back out there can be difficult; sometimes we harbor pain from the past and it stops us from creating a new future. The only way to completely move on is to let love back into your life again (when you’re ready).
Here are five steps to being open to love again:
Allow yourself to be vulnerable again.
It can be difficult to open yourself up again when you know that the outcome can be devastating. But by breaking down your walls you are given the opportunity of meeting someone who will either take that vulnerability and hurt you again or love and honor you. You are so much stronger after the last heartbreak that you deserve to give yourself the chance of meeting the person who wouldn’t dream of hurting you.
Leave the heartbreak in the past, but learn from the relationship.
With every failed relationship, you are one step closer to meeting your soulmate. You learn so much about yourself and what you don’t want in a relationship. While moving forward you will be able to see red flags in other prospective partners and know that it won’t end well. You know what you will and will not stand for. Try to be grateful for the lessons you’ve learned.
Be honest about your concerns.
When you feel comfortable, it is important to be open about what has hurt you in the past. By expressing your concerns and what you need in a relationship, a new significant other is given the chance to do right by you and check-in and make sure you’re feeling okay. Hiding your past will not enable a new partner to see the reason behind your vulnerabilities.
Leave any resentment behind.
Not all men are the same. Just because you have been hurt before, maybe multiple times, it’s not fair to expect a new partner to do the same. You could end up pushing someone away if you act bitter towards them and expect them to hurt you early on. Try to have a positive outlook when entering new territory.
Know that you deserve love.
Sometimes we blame ourselves for what went wrong in our past relationships. You may think there is something wrong with you, or even consider yourself unlovable. We can forget that we also need to forgive ourselves for failed relationships. We are always learning and growing. Just because you didn’t get it right before doesn’t mean you won’t in the future. Tell yourself that you deserve to be loved and that you are worthy.
Disclaimer: This article is the opinion of the author.