Love is complicated. In 2016, the idea that we fall in love at least three times in our lifetime popularized and took the whole world by storm. Kate Rose, who first wrote her article in Elephant Journal, stated we fall in love three different times — each for a different reason.
According to Rose, the first is to teach you about expectations, the second to teach you about who you are, and the third is to teach you about what love truly means. The last will come out of nowhere.
Note: There isn’t hard evidence to show that this is true, although many people believe it to be true.
First Relationship: Puppy Love
Most people believe that this one often happens when we are young. The first relationship is known as puppy love because you are often stuck in the honeymoon stage. The honeymoon stage is the only stage you experience before the relationship crashes and burns. That is why many people believe this relationship is full of lust and not actually love. This whole relationship is truly intense.
Second Relationship: Transformative and Difficult Love
This love is the one that changes you. This love includes a lot of hurt, betrayal, lies and drama. Even though it has all of these negative aspects, you will still look back on the good memories. According to Michael Zampiglia, a writer for Medium.com, this love makes you a stronger version of yourself. You learn who you are and you learn more about whom you really want to become. Zampiglia says, “You become picky. You become closed off. You become cautious. You become guarded. You become self-aware.”
That is why no one tells you that in this relationship, compatibility matters. Sometimes they may have everything you could have ever wanted in a partner, but you still don’t vibe well with one another.
Third and Last Love: The Curve Ball
They say that this love comes from left field. It comes out of the blue. It comes when you stop searching for love and have given up on being in a relationship with someone. This is the love that people talk about when they say “you will find love when you stop looking for it.”
This is the one that emanates real life. They aren’t typically your type, they say, but somehow you are irrevocably drawn to them. In this relationship, you learn what real love is. However, according to Brianna Wiest of ThoughtCatalog, what they don’t teach you about this love is that it isn’t always easy. It’s hard, sometimes, but you wouldn’t trade it for the world. A partner is not supposed to fix your whole life but stand by your side and go through life’s journey as you fix yourself.