Your man, like you, lives two lives – the one out in the open that everyone can see and the one in his head. Here are 10 things he might really want from you, but won’t ask.
Make a grand gesture of your affection
To ask for it would seem needy. But every now and then, he really wants it to be unmistakably clear that you love him this much! We like it when you become vulnerable and expressive.
“Could you clean your hair out of the drain?”
Okay, on behalf of the Men’s Union, I hereby inform you that when I see your hair clumping up in the shower drain, it makes me want to vomit. Could you please, pretty please, get that drain mouse out of there?
“Do something elsewhere”
Sometimes I’m really absorbed in something while, nearby, my wife is desperately trying to find something to do (this goes both ways, FYI). Maybe I’m writing this article that you’re reading and she starts asking, “What should we get your mom for her birthday?” What I want to say is, “Honey, I love you, but could you be elsewhere while I’m writing?” What I say instead is, “Maybe wind chimes.”
“I’d love a backrub”
He works all day. You work all day. When you both get home, neither of you have energy left for anything. Still, now and then he just wants to be pampered. But he knows asking isn’t welcome—or at least that’s what he thinks. Should he?
Ask me for my opinion or advice
Sometimes your fella likes to know that you respect his problem solving mind. And if you’ve read any of my articles, you know by now that men love to solve problems (or try to anyway). So if my wife comes to me and says, “I’ve tried to fix the closet door but it still won’t close. What do you think I should do?” there’s a good chance I’m there with her and my toolbox before she can say, “Put your pants on.”
Give me some sugar
Now and again, every man likes to feel like he’s so attractive that you just can’t help but throw yourself at him. But how do we ask for that? So we may prune or flaunt or perform a ritual mating dance, which is our way of saying, “Hey, you want some of this?”
“Are you happy?”
We really want to know that our loved ones are happy. Again, it’s an awkward thing to ask. So if you spontaneously express joy, we will usually start expressing too.
Everybody likes a nice surprise. Not a surprise party, but something I can’t anticipate. We, guys, like being kept on our toes. Besides, it’s also a sign that you’re not in a rut; you’re thinking on your feet.
Stay close to me, but not too close
We want you near, but not necessarily all the time. We need space to be individuals, just like you do. There’s a time for snuggles and a time for distance – neither of which is a bad thing.