Sometimes it can feel easier to settle for less – at home, at work or in our relationships. We shy away from standing up for ourselves in order to avoid conflict or coming across as high-maintenance. But there are some instances in life where you shouldn’t ever back down.
When you’re losing too much of yourself
People-pleasing is a weakness for many of us. We feel like we have to prove ourselves in order to get ahead or to be seen as useful so we put our desires on the backburner. It’s important to assert yourself (women especially) when you feel strongly about something you believe in. People value your opinion more than you may realize, even if they may not agree with you. You’re offering a fresh new perspective that they might not have ever considered (and who doesn’t love fresh ideas?)
When your boundaries are compromised
When it comes to the things you must take a hard stand on (such as religious beliefs, the men we meet, social issues, etc.) be firm. Establishing boundaries is crucial to having healthy and happy relationships. It also attracts emotionally stable people. Let go of the fear of being portrayed as a “bitch”—you’re not one. You have a backbone.
When you’re in desperate need of alone time
By now, most of us know about the wonders solitude can do for your relationships and overall well-being. But it’s not always easy to give ourselves that luxury for fear of seeming distant or cold. In relationships, our partners may even feel like we’re upset with them about something that we’re keeping bottled up. But alone time helps us refocus without external pressures and realigns us with what we truly need. Don’t let others make you feel guilty for not spending that time with them.
When they belittle your decision-making
You may have a person or person(s) in your life where their decisions will always take priority over yours. Distance yourself from them (if not, leave them!) If people truly care about you, they will always consider how you feel. If your partner is constantly the one to call the shots about where you go and what you do (while undermining your decisions), you may be dealing with a manipulator or emotional abuser—in which case, reach out for support.
When your gut tells you something isn’t right
Our gut is like our second brain. If someone says something you find offensive or treats you in a way that feels uncomfortable, speak up. When you compromise your self-respect, you’re also chipping away at the respect that others will have for you. Let your intuition speak for itself.
The opinions expressed in this article are the opinions of the writer.
