We all want to be happy, but why is it so difficult for many of us to achieve? What gets in the way of really enjoying life? Here are some suggestions of root causes and what to do differently.
Hanging on to the past
Many of us have had something in our lives, early on, that did not support us to move forward. Once we are aware of what happened and how it may distort who we are now, why do we chose to keep replaying it? Is it the fear of getting on, and not knowing what the future will bring when we venture out? It takes courage to step out in a new way, but women are among the most courageous people on the planet, so take a risk. You can take just take one small action to begin with–you can always go back to the way things were before.
Expecting things to be different than the way they are
The Serenity Prayer shares great wisdom: Accept the things you cannot change, change the things you can, and have the wisdom to know the difference.
Our energy is limited and if we spend it on things that can’t be fixed, we end up
miserable. We need to be deliberate about what we give our time and attention to, know that there are some things we have no control over, and put our energy toward the things we can change.
When self-doubt rears its ugly head, it can be a real downer. We make a decision about a person, place or thing, feel good about what we decided, and then start to worry whether we made the right choice. We drive ourselves and the people around us crazy when we do this. Once you have made a decision and taken action, get yourself into the mindset of moving on—say to yourself NEXT! (And mean it!)
Always looking at what you don’t have
When you don’t acknowledge what you have or do, and nothing is good enough, you torment yourself, and are far from feeling happy about your life. They say, “Compare and Despair,” isn’t that the truth? Get into the habit of giving yourself the credit you deserve by acknowledging all that you do. And practice gratitude for the things you have.
Being too introspective
If you are always thinking about yourself, you are more than likely not a happy camper. When we overthink, it’s like hanging around a bad neighborhood because we are listening to our negative thoughts. Take an interest in someone else, a friend or family member. You’d be surprised by how good that will make you feel.
Don’t let others bring you down
Stop listening to negative people who are jealous of you and will find fault. They are pointing a finger at you because they’re afraid to look at themselves.