It’s a sentiment that most women are all-too-familiar with: “Just wait until you have a daughter”.
A rallying cry of stressed parents everywhere, Sandra Bullock’s mother, opera singer Helga Meyer, would often repeat that to her, when they faced friction in their relationship. Bullock, it seems, took the statement to heart.
“I have to be honest and say the thought of having a daughter scared me,” she told People. “And the thought that a daughter of mine would be anything like I was scared me senseless.”
Today, Bullock is a mother of two. She adopted her first child, Louis, while still married to ex-husband, Jesse James. After their divorce, Bullock adopted a second child, Laila, alone. Her fears about motherhood are still present, but her outlook has shifted, as she tells ET, “…Once you have children, you go, ‘My life was nothing until you showed up.'”
Bullock is raising her children without the presence of her mother, who passed away in 2000, but the impact of their bond guides her choices.
“Before my mom passed away, we had a moment at her bedside where I was shut down and trying not to cry, and she simply said, ‘Don’t be like me.’ In that moment a lot of our lifetime together had been explained. She didn’t want me to go through life shut down, afraid of feeling. Well, life has made sure I feel everything now, and I’m not ashamed to admit it anymore.”
As for feeling everything, Bullock has been open about the ups and downs of motherhood, saying “For me, it’s the most painful and beautiful feeling on a daily basis. My kids destroy me daily.”
Bullock’s life now revolves around her young children. She has admitted to taking fewer roles, as she believes time with her kids is more valuable than prestige or career. Bullock has mentioned that life is like a circle; a process of finding what you’re good at to support yourself, while you figure out what you’re “meant” to do. In her life, Bullock is meant to be a mother. Her own mother’s advice and warnings seemed to prepare her for this role—or at least, give her a fair warning!
“If Laila gave me what I gave, I’ll know it was all Helga B.’s doing and she is laughing her ass off,” she said. “I am fully prepared for that ride.”