Whether it’s a boss with choice words, your unsupportive significant other, your overbearing in-laws or an internet troll, some people have perfected the art of getting under your skin. They then watch you descend into an emotional pool of tears and hurt feelings. Stop replaying that old movie, and create a new path and outcome for yourself.
Don’t take it personally
Everyone does not need to like you. Yes, you may be considerate to your family or go out of your way to support your coworkers, but they still cut you up with their words. Get over it. Some people are going through their own personal journey and they cope by being rude and inconsiderate to others. You can’t change them but you can refuse to receive their emotional garbage.
Choose your battles
Not every battle that comes before you is one you need to fight. Before you decide to unleash your tongue on the poor soul who decided to come up against you, sit back and consider what you are going to gain. Keep in mind the old adage about when you allow someone to anger you. You are in essence giving up your power and allowing them to have control. But let’s get real—there are some battles you need to fight. When you do decide to fight back, be strategic in your approach.
Clap back, cut back or take a social media break
If you have a social media presence, you are automatically a target for haters, and people will criticize you regardless of what you post. If you decide to clap back, be precise and move on. Sometimes the best way to handle the vile comments on social media is to take a break. Disconnect completely, limit the time on social media or filter what you read. A complete disconnect can give you the space to mentally recharge and get back on your feet.
Consider the source
Before you sink into a complete pity party and get your feelings hurt, stop and consider the source of the criticism. Is this your boss telling you how you need to improve your work, or a jealous coworker looking to claw their way to the top? Does this person speak from a place of authority, wisdom and facts or pure emotion?
Look for the truth
Sometimes when we are offended, it’s because there is some truth to the matter and it’s frustrating. Ouch! Do you feel exposed? Does it hurt? Before you discredit the criticism, take a minute to see if the part that is true is really what’s bothering you. Stop hiding and blaming others and take the time to get brave and face the ugliness you desperately want to avoid.