First of all, it’s important to say that most men, usually, are thrilled about falling in love with someone. No man can deny the magical feeling of completeness and wonder that is love. OK, now that we’ve said that, let’s really talk.
He still has scars from last time
It might be that he opened his heart to another and got burned. That’s hard to let go of. Maybe you need to help him nurse his heart back to health. Not only will he then be able to express himself better, he may remember that it was you who helped him grow.
He’s afraid he can’t measure up
He may want to love you, he may even love you already, but since women are so communicative that they tend to do a much better job at expressing what other people mean to them. That can be intimidating to a man. He might worry that you feel more strongly about love than he does, and if you do, he could never live up to it your expectations.
A mental health issue may cloud his positive outlook
Anxiety disorders affect more than 40 million people in the US, and the World Health Organization estimates that more than 16 million people suffer from depression in the US. Maybe he is one of those people. You might think, “Well I’d know if he was depressed, right?” No, not necessarily. But depression means he can’t see a positive future, and love is about now and (potentially) forever. He may need help.
He’s afraid his feelings won’t be reciprocated
If you are having trouble expressing your emotions, then it is almost certainly more difficult for him. That’s just how guys work in general. He would be afraid to take that leap first for fear you wouldn’t return his love. Besides, men know women are the experts – we need them to guide us through love. Now, I don’t know many guys who would let that kind of fear of rejection stop them, but it’s a possibility.
He doesn’t want to be vulnerable
Nothing new here. Men don’t like to be open about their feelings. They can’t seem defenseless to their fathers, or their friends or family, so they can’t feel vulnerable to themselves. As a result, when it comes time to cut away the supports and dive fully into the love pool, they freeze up.
Committing may mean giving up too much of himself
Love means putting away childish things and committing to a person, a lifestyle and an ideal. We don’t want to put away our childish things. What’s ironic here is that love can be silly and childish! Maybe it’s reassuring to let him know that he doesn’t have to change who he is and suddenly turn into someone else.
