Many of us will experience many relationships before we find “the one”. Heartbreaks can have us asking ourselves, “Why do I have to go through this pain?” Well, the simple answer is the important lessons you learn along the way teach you what you want and don’t want, and make you better for the right person.
Here are three important lessons to learn from your ex:
- Usually, the small things that bother you in the beginning end up being the things that cause you to walk away.
Don’t be fooled in the honeymoon phase and write off important things to you because “everything else” is great.
- You can love someone and not be able to be compatible.
It is possible to love someone and not be compatible. Holding on to a relationship you know isn’t right for you only wastes the time you could be spending looking for someone else.
- Living your life individually makes your relationship stronger.
No one likes to be smothered. If you are always down each other’s throats and never doing your own thing you will stunt yourself from growing into the person you’re meant to be.
- Being yourself is the most important thing.
Since everyone likes a different “type” it’s best to be yourself and not put on any façade to lure someone in. If they like you for the good, the bad, and the ugly it’s more likely to work.
- Verbal abuse is still abuse.
It might take a long time to realize that just because someone is not actively hitting you DOES NOT mean that they are treating you right.
- Emotionally relying on someone else is cheating.
If you are holding on to an unsatisfying relationship because someone else at work is listening to how your day went then you’re being neglected in some ways. Something’s got to give. If you’re looking for happiness elsewhere, you simply aren’t happy.
- If someone wants to have time for you, they will find it.
- Twice a cheater will always be a cheater.
How does the saying go? Fool me once shame on you, fool me twice shame on me. If it’s a recurring issue…don’t expect change.
- A good sense of humor should be one of your non-negotiables.
Laughter is always there in the dark times, no matter how weight you gain, or old you get.
- Your relationship is a reflection of how you see yourself.
We allow others to treat us the way we think we deserve to be treated.
*This article is the opinion of the author.